Essay

Dear Madonna

By Jennifer Matsui

You are no doubt dismayed by the public outrage that has greeted your decision to adopt a baby boy from Malawi. After all, what kind of person would condemn a child to a life of hardship and squalor, especially the kind of person with millions at her disposal, who can lavish the child with every consumer item under the sun?

Little David Banda is the luckiest boy in the world, you tell yourself. One minute he's in an overcrowded, underfunded orphanage in one of the poorest nations on Earth, and the next minute he's flying over the ocean in a private jet to make his new home on a palatial English estate.

No stranger to criticism, you probably think the public backlash over your latest publicity stunt is just more sour grapes. And what exactly are they complaining about?

Here's the problem, Madonna. You swoop into Malawi with a yet-to-be-signed check for $3 million, hoping that by pledging the money to an orphanage, the authorities will re-write the laws in your favor. "What laws?" you fume when someone points out to you that your actions amount to kidnapping, even if a bribed official has given your crime the government stamp of approval.

Someone else points out to you that under Malawi law, people hoping to adopt children must live in the country for at least 18 months. "This dump doesn't even have flush toilets, what makes them think their laws mean anything?" you scream.

Undaunted, you return to your tent and check yourself in the full-length mirror you brought along for the occasion and make the final adjustments to your outfit. You told your stylist you wanted your look to be evocative of Africa's colonial era. This is why you've chosen to dress like the mistress of a wealthy plantation owner.

After a hard day at the orphanage, choosing a baby that will compliment that wonderful hand-woven bag you picked up in the market earlier, you decide it's time to celebrate. With the entire international press corps surrounding you, you seize the chance to make a video for your next dance hit.

In the clamor and excitement of the festivities no one notices as you give the little "orphan" to your assistant to spirit away. You insist on calling him an orphan, even though his father is alive, but temporarily unable to raise his son, owing to tragic circumstances. The death of his wife has left him an impoverished widower with no other choice but to relinquish custody of his son until he can get back on his feet.

For considerably less than what you paid for David, you could have given David's father that opportunity, but instead you chose to overlook that, and left Mr. Banda to deal with his loss, not knowing he had just signed away his son forever. He was just hoping that the "nice" American lady would provide the boy with an education and raise him until he was ready to return to his homeland.

No such luck. Since Mr. Banda can neither read or write, there was no way his consent should be considered legal or binding. Clearly, he was misled by the orphanage in order to speed up the process.

But naturally, you blame all the negative publicity on the media, whom you accuse of manipulating Mr. Banda to give false and conflicting accounts of the situation. You present yourself as the victim of a media smear campaign.

In the meantime, Mr. Banda is forced to reconsider his options and "agrees" to relinquish custody of his son to your permanent care. Congratulations. Your hardwon victory gives hope to wealthy, white baby shoppers everywhere.

Shukan ST: Nov. 10, 2006

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