New York Sign Language

New Yorker Faces the Summer Tourist Rush

By BOB YAMPOLSKY

A couple of years back, when I started taking my camera out on walks in the city, my father said to me, "But people will think that you're a tourist."

He had a pained look on his face and he spoke in such a way that suggested that I was about to bring everlasting shame to the family name.

My father was born in New York and lived most of his life here, and like most New Yorkers he had a native aversion to tourists. I don't really have one's good reason why New Yorkers dislike tourists. I guess it's that they're just annoying in a number of little ways. They come in big groups that move slowly and block the sidewalks. They ride tour buses that move slowly and block the streets. They gawk and take pictures of stupid things. They buy tacky souvenirs from the overpriced stores. They just . . . well, they're just annoying, that's all.

For New Yorkers who think this way, summer is the most annoying season, because while New York has tourists year round, it is in summer that they actually take over parts of the city. As the first of our signs for today ― an ad for a July issue of an entertainment magazine — warns, it's summertime, and "Here come the tourists!"

This ad shows a typical caricature of a tourist visiting New York: an obvious hick, with his straw hat and plaid polyester pants, armed with a video camera, camera, binoculars and fanny pack, and a "Gosh, Emma, look, a genuine homeless person" look of astonishment on his face.

This is the country bumpkin, a familiar character in New York City folklore — the old story is of the con man "selling" the Brooklyn Bridge to some greenhorn. (Strictly speaking, "country bumpkin" and "greenhorn" mean folks from the real country, but to New Yorkers, anyone who doesn't live in New York is in some sense a hick.)

Our second sign for today, which is an ad for a line of clothes by a designer named Kenneth Cole, mocks tourists for their ignorance of New York: "4 OUT OF 5 TOURISTS LOOKING FOR SOHO ARE IN IT." (Then underneath it gives a quote from Mr. Cole, who apparently is something of a philosopher-poet: "To be aware is more important than what you wear.")

If you ask me, it's a rather odd and mean-spirited way to try to sell clothes, but I think I understand the psychology behind it. There are an awful lot of young people in New York who have just moved here, and these people are insecure about their status as New Yorkers. So this ad appeals to them because they know that, compared to tourists at least, they are long-time New Yorkers.

New York has grown more tourist-friendly in recent years. Part of it is just that the city has become safer and cleaner. Times Square, which used to be the sleaze center of New York, is now the site of such tourist spots as the Disney Store and the Hard Rock Cafe, and is a virtual tourist mall. The other part of it is the result of a conscious effort to attract tourists and their dollars. There was a campaign a couple of years back to teach taxi drivers and others who deal directly with tourists to be polite to them. There are new signs up all over the city just for tourists, directing them to places like the Empire State Building. And the tourists are coming here in droves.

I was in my 20s before I first went up the Empire State Building (I was taking around some tourists from Japan), and it had always been a matter of pride to me that I had never set foot on Liberty Island, where the Statue of Liberty stands. (I went for the first time last year, on the insistence of my non-native New Yorker wife.) I guess my most embarrassing tourist-related experience came when I was taking my Japanese cousin around Central Park, and she stopped to take pictures of squirrels. Squirrels! I had to distance myself from her, lest anyone think that I was involved.

I remember another joke: If a flying saucer came and hovered over New York, a real New Yorker wouldn't look up, for fear of being mistaken for a tourist gawking at all the tall buildings. I'll admit that as I go around the city with my camera, I worry about being mistaken for a tourist.

Last Christmas, as I was taking pictures like a tourist, two fellows came up to me and said, mockingly, "So, do you speak English?"

I looked at them and sized them up for a second or two. In an unexpected New York encounter the first calculation is whether the other party is in any way dangerous. These two did not seem to be. From my guess they were recent transplants to the city. If they were tourists, they would not go around mocking others, and if they were long-time New Yorkers, they would not have bothered. I was about to walk away, but in a flash of inspiration, I felt my tongue speak in an exaggerated New York accent: "Better than you ever will, buddy." Then I folded up my camera and went home.

Shukan ST: Aug. 28, 1998

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