Essay

Fly like a bird

By Caroline Pover

During the first month of the new year, many people around me decided to change something about their lives, usually involving giving something up. These decisions are commonly called New Year's resolutions. I asked a few friends what they had decided to change about their lives this year or in the past. I wanted to find out what New Year's resolutions they had made - and whether they had managed to keep them or break them.

My friend Holly decides that she will stop smoking EVERY year! And she never manages to do it for very long at all because she is usually at some great party until the early hours of New Year's Day, and starts smoking again at the party. But she keeps trying every year.

Last year she had two other resolutions, at which she was much more successful. She promised herself that she would pay off all her debts, and managed to make her last payment in November. She also wanted to lose weight, so she joined a gym in January and lost five kilograms by April just by exercising and without changing her eating or drinking patterns. Good for her !

This year (apart from her usual "quit smoking" resolution, which of course was broken again within a few hours), she decided to generally be more healthy, so her Japanese boyfriend bought her a book for Christmas called "Japanese Women Don't Get Old or Fat: Secrets of My Mother's Tokyo Kitchen" (what a strange title!), and she is hoping to become an expert in healthy cooking.

It seems that many people I know have decided to stop drinking this year, perhaps not for the whole year but at least for the month of January, to give their bodies a little break after all the Christmas celebrations. My friends Nicky, Jen and Mark have all given up drinking alcohol, and so has my husband, which has also meant that I'ｖe been drinking quite a bit less without my drinking buddies!

As for New Year's resolutions, I tend to make goals for the coming year that involve doing something, rather than giving something up. For example, last January I made it a goal to save enough money so that I could pay for half of my wedding in October (my husband paid the other half), and I succeeded. I have rarely saved for anything in my life so this was a great achievement for me

My attitude to New Year's resolutions is similar to my answer to a question I often get asked: "What is your dream?" This always strikes me as an odd question - as odd as waiting for a new year to change something about yourself. I am usually too busy living my dream to think about what a future dream might be. I try to make the most of every day, and if I want to change something about myself, then I try to do it then and there.

One of my friends has a very similar feeling, and never makes New Year's resolutions. She believes that if we want to change something, then we should change it as soon as we realize we want to change it. Her belief comes from her father, who is Swedish, and often says, "Only captured birds have longings; the wild ones fly." Of course this doesn't apply to everyone who makes New Year's resolutions, but it is an interesting saying to remember.

Maybe a good New Year's resolution would be to become a wild bird, and whatever you long to be or do, try to make that happen straight away!

Shukan ST: Feb. 3, 2006

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