Working life

Thirty is the new 20?

By Masako Yamada

30歳になったものの、考え方や振る舞いに子供っぽさが残る、と自分を省みる筆者。しかし、最近、一社会人として将来について考えるようになった

If the Japanese invented the phrase "parasite single," the American equivalent of the term is probably "adultolescent." It's a combination of the words "adolescent" and "adult." Although it used to be the case that children were to become independent by age 21 - or even age 18 in some circles - nowadays, it's not uncommon for adult children to live with their parents well into their 20s or even later. Given the current tough economy, even college graduates may live with their parents temporarily before they are able to become economically secure. Granted, in many cases, it's not by choice that the kids live at home, but it's not entirely without benefits, either.

There used to be a chatty administrative assistant in the cubicle next to mine with two children about my age. She told me that her son had recently moved back home. He has a college degree in broadcast journalism or some other creative-media field, but he's been forced to take a job as a truck driver to make ends meet. She told me that when she was his age, she was married, had two children, owned a home, worked full time and earned her college degree by taking night classes. Things are different now, she exclaimed, with understandable exasperation.

I turned 30 in April, and way back when this administrative assistant was my age, this was considered "over the hill." I barely feel as if I'ｖe started climbing the hill. This birthday is obviously just another day in the calendar, but it's been a good opportunity for me to reflect on where I am in my life and what path I want to take.

I'ｖe been financially independent since I graduated from college - and, of course, I have a full-time job now - but in many ways, I still act like a 20-year-old. I often leave dishes piled up in the sink or dump my clothes straight from the dryer onto my bed. I'm not terribly good at keeping up with annual Christmas cards or writing thank-you notes. I often drink coffee in lieu of dinner when I work late. Most obviously, I'm not married and I don't have kids. The future is still quite open for me.

In the States, it's considered improper to ask a person's age at work since it might lead to age-related discrimination. However, one can usually guess another person's age quite easily by asking how much work experience the person has, or by asking when that person graduated from college. I'ｖe never tried to hide my age, and when I found out that two of my co-workers were also turning 30, I felt it was an event worthy of celebration. I asked my project leader whether she'd be willing to throw a party for us and she agreed. She even bought us flowers!

アメリカのメディアでも取り上げられた日本の｢パラサイトシングル」(http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/WPcap/2000-02/10/101r-021000-idx.html)

Now that my co-workers know how old I am, I'ｖe gotten surprised remarks: "Really? I thought you were about 25!" I don't exactly know what kind of calculations they'ｖe been doing in their heads, because that would mean that I'd have gotten my Ph.D. at the tender age of 23!

I will admit that I probably act young for my age. I don't know whether this is good or bad. I notice that when I'm with a group of colleagues, I'm often the most enthusiastic of the bunch. But this could easily be turned around to imply that I'm naive. All I can say is that I may feel 20 and look 25, but I'ｖe been spending some serious time thinking of how I want to live my life as a proper adult. I haven't reached any grand conclusions. No, I haven't figured out The Meaning of Life yet.

Apparently, I'm not the only one who has been pondering the future. I recently got together with one of my superiors at work to discuss my work plans. He asked me about my longer-term interests, since it would help direct my actions for this year. I told him I didn't really have any plans. He is almost 50 years old and he's spent 20 years with the same company, but he told me that he still hasn't quite figured out what he wants to be when he grows up, either.

Shukan ST: May 7, 2004

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