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シドニー留学は夢かまぼろしか
「ここはどこ?」——帰国の翌朝、そうつぶやいて目覚めた武藤さん。
今でもときどき、まだシドニーにいるような錯覚に襲われ、日本語でしゃべっているのが妙に感じられることがあります。
でも、地元の大学のキャンパスで再会した友達仲間と話していると、まるでみんなと別れたのはつい先週のことで、
10ヵ月もシドニーに行っていたなんて、うそのような気がするのです…。
Waking dream
The day after I got back from Sydney, I woke up, mumbling, "Where am I?"
It took a while to adjust. Occasionally I'd think I was still in Sydney, and I'd feel weird about writing and speaking Japanese. Sometimes I'd be in mid-sentence and suddenly I'd have a mental blank. I'd have forgotten how to say something in Japanese. I'd only hear the English echoing in my head.
It's often said you go through a kind of reverse culture shock when you return to your own country, and I think this is true.
Take, for example, the 45 minutes it takes for me to get to university by car. I've traveled that route countless times before, but after coming back from Sydney, I was looking at everything in a different way. It was a strange feeling: a mixture of nostalgia and novelty. I was also aware of how time had slid by: New buildings had gone up, and some restaurants and shops had closed.
On campus, I met up with some friends. I was thrilled to see them at first, and they were thrilled to see me, but once we got to talking, it was as though I'd only seen them the week before. Nothing much had changed. They hadn't changed, and, to be honest, I found that a little disappointing.
I went to class. Normally, students aren't allowed to take up courses midway through term but an exception was made for me. At first, I was impressed by my surroundings: real Japanese students listening to real Japanese lecturers speaking real Japanese. Wow! But then, gradually, the feeling that it was all very ordinary began to sink in. Again, that sense of disappointment that nothing at all had changed.
That night, a close friend of mine gave me a call and we went out for Chinese. We went to a noodle place we used to go to once or twice a week. It was great to catch up but after a while the conversation became like any other conversation we might have had before I'd left. That's not to say it wasn't fun, but it was nothing out of the ordinary. It was as though Sydney had never happened.
My friend started humming a tune. Apparently it had been a huge hit in Japan while I was in Sydney, but I hadn't heard it before. "Of course," he said. "Sorry. You wouldn't know it, would you? I was beginning to forget you'd been in Sydney for such a long time."
It was funny he should say that because I was feeling the same way. The memories of Sydney were fading fast. They were beginning to become like fragments of some waking dream. It was as though my experiences in Australia were being swallowed up in a great tsunami of Japanese culture.
I began to panic. I didn't want to forget. I didn't want to let go. I wanted these experiences to be a part of me for the rest of my life. I also knew that as these memories grew more distant, my English would decline as well.
I had to find a solution.
- Waking dream
- 白昼夢
- woke up, mumbling 〜
- 目が覚めて、〜とつぶやいた
- It took a while to 〜
- 〜するのに少しかかった
- adjust
- 順応する
- Occasionally
- ときには
- (would)feel weird about 〜
- 〜するのが奇妙に感じられた
- (would)be in mid-sentence and suddenly 〜
- 話の途中で突然〜
- (would)have a mental blank
- 頭が真っ白になった
- (would)have forgotten 〜
- 〜を忘れた
- echoing
- 繰り返される
- go through 〜
- 〜を経験する
- reverse
- 逆の
- Take, for example 〜
- 例えば〜
- get to 〜
- 〜に行く
- countless times
- 何度も何度も
- strange
- 変な
- mixture of 〜
- 〜が交じったもの
- nostalgia
- 懐かしい気持ち
- novelty
- 目新しさ
- was also aware of 〜
- 〜にも気付いた
- how time had slid by
- 時が過ぎたこと
- had gone up
- 建った
- had closed
- 閉店した
- met up with 〜
- 〜に会った
- was thrilled to 〜 at first
- 初めは〜してわくわくした
- once 〜
- 〜すると
- as though 〜
- あたかも〜のように
- Nothing much had changed
- それほど変わっていなかった
- to be honest
- 正直言うと
- disappointing
- がっかりした
- aren't allowed to 〜
- 〜できない
- take up 〜
- 〜を受講し始める
- midway through term
- 学期の途中で
- exception
- 特例
- was impressed by 〜
- 〜に感銘を受けた
- surroundings
- 環境
- Wow
- すごい
- gradually
- 徐々に
- all very ordinary
- とてもありふれた
- sink in
- 分かってくる
- sense of 〜
- 〜の感情
- gave me a call
- 電話をくれた
- went out for Chinese
- 中華料理を食べに行った
- noodle place
- ラーメン屋
- used to 〜
- 〜していた
- once or twice a week
- 週に1度か2度
- catch up
- 旧交を温める
- after a while
- しばらくして
- That's not to say 〜
- 〜という意味ではない
- nothing out of the ordinary
- いつもと違わないこと
- Sydney
- シドニーへの留学
- started humming a tune
- 鼻歌を歌い始めた
- Apparently 〜
- 〜らしい
- huge hit
- 大きなヒット
- It was funny 〜
- 〜なのは面白い
- memories
- 思い出
- were fading fast
- 急速に薄れてきている
- fragments
- 一部分
- experiences
- 経験
- were being swallowed up in 〜
- 〜に飲み込まれる
- let go
- このまま忘れ去る
- for the rest of my life
- この先の人生でずっと
- grew more distant
- おぼろげになる
- decline
- 低下する
- solution
- 解決策